Enjoy the small happy moments - especially in stressful times
Some of you might know that my husband and I recently had our first child. Now, a lot of people said that this can really have an impact on a relationship, and I have to say being 6 months into the game it is absolutely true. I would even do so far to say that if one is not careful, it can destroy relationships quite quickly all together. It is therefore very important to learn to enjoy the small moments again and not to get overwhelmed with all the endless to dos we face ourselves with every day.
A child is of course a major change to a relationship but there can also be other major changes in our life that proof to be hard for us and our partner. It is therefore essential not to get lost and overwhelmed in the day to day takes like - who empties the dishwasher or takes the bin out. To start with, those tasks should be clearly assigned in terms of responsibilities. It needs to be clear who does what in the house and when . Once that is clear, we don’t need to think about it anymore and will already feel that the workload is divided a lot more equally. This can already help a lot.
Next to clear assignment of roles and responsibilities, we need to make sure we take time outs. Those little moments where we go for a meal with our partner or just enjoy a glass of wine without all the hustle in the pub . This for us for example is a night without children where it is just the two of us. It is absolutely essential for a relationship to take this time a da couple where it is not all about work or children or the next step in life. This time is just to have fun- be romantic like in the old days and times.
Additionally, when one can afford it, it makes sense to get help . This can either be the odd babysitting session of the family or this can be a professional babysitter, cleaner etc. The whole point here is to outsource tasks where we feel we don’t have the time to prioritise at the moment because we are too busy with other things that come our way . By outsourcing some of those, we will have the capacity to enjoy moments with our partner and not always be stressed about things we might forget to do .
Small moments with friends or partners are absolutely essential . They don’t always have ti he the fancy night ours they can also be walks in nature or just the odd meet-up for a coffee. It is important that in those moments however our mind is really there and enjoys the time and conversations. There is no point being distracted and thinking about the next tasks ahead. We are allowed to take those moments in and to have those timeouts. As they will provide us the energy to go full stream again once back in the madness.
Learn to enjoy the small moments and especially take those small moments, make time for them in your day to day routine - that should always be possible . Get help where you can to free up time and you will feel a lot more balanced and happier in the long term with stress levels significantly reducing. Those moments with your partners are like chargers that you need to keep your energy levels and spirit high
