Why we need to stop making new year’s resolution lists and start living a little
Many of us are coming back from holidays these days, and as we are now in 2022. The strange thing, even more of us will have made lists of all those new year’s resolutions we are eager to achieve as we are excited for what 2022 will bring for us. The problem is, as we know come end of January, we already have forgotten about most of them and are back into our day-to-day routines we were so eager to change. The question is therefore - do we even need those new year’s resolutions and how do we come up with resolutions that are realistic and that we can stick to, to bring about real change for a better future?
One thing is clear, just stating that we want to quit smoking won’t just do the job. Most of us spend very little time to think about those things we really want to change for ourselves and why we want to change them. Coming up with any form of resolution therefore firstly requires a phase of deep reflection and understanding of our current situation or where we stand, and where we want to go in the future. Only when we take that time to reflect, can we come up with resolutions and future goals that are truly relevant to us.
A second very important aspect next to taking time to reflect, is to be precise. Write goals or resolutions down and apply a concrete timeframe to them. It is different to say “I want to find a new job this year” or to write down “I would like to be a senior manager in a global tech company and have an employment contract signed by 1st of May this year”. The difference is that the second goals is much more precise and therefore easier to measure. However, this is exactly what we are scared of as well, as when we can measure a goal very well the fear of failure when not achieving it is even stronger. However, precise, and clear goals are much easier to achieve or even to partially achieve. It can even help to break them down into further smaller steps to not make the end goals seem too overwhelming and difficult to achieve. The clearer the roadmap, the better really!
However, while it is great to reflect and write precise goals down, it is important the resolutions and goal setting remain a fun and exciting activity and does not only result in stress and anxiety. It is fun to draw up plans of the future and to have a perspective and a clear plan of what you want to achieve this year. A little stress is healthy and good when it comes to resolutions, if you really want to bring about serious and long-term change, but you should also live a little and while you have a big picture framework, not forget to live in the moment and not take those resolutions too serious, so that they result in stress. Then you are even less likely to achieve them, as we associate them with negativity and anxious feeling which will stop us from establishing realistic and clear goals for the new year in the first place.
Lastly, probably the most important point, failure is fun. It is ok to look back onto your goals in three- or six-months’ time and not have achieved them. Things change and not all goals are there to be achieved. It is ok to fail, and it is ok not to achieve all of our goals. If we achieve some of them amazing if we achieve none, we should reflect why but it is ok too. The worst we can do is not to have any in the first place as we are scared of failure. Do establish goals and learn while being on the journey.
With all those tips, we can find a balance between establishing realistic goals that are fun to achieve and not forgetting to live in the moment. If we achieve only that 2022 can be fantastic!
